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Why?

Today all that is in my mind is the ever present question,

Why?

Why Ethan & Nathan?

Why?

Why did I become pregnant with twins but they never separated?

Why?

Why do I have to live with this aching feeling and have nothing to hold on to?

Why?

I miss them so much and my heart is just so down. 

My littles are praying to God for another baby. 

Why? Why? Why?

My voice is echoing in the night reverberating with a dull and sometimes muffled, why?

I know I may never come to find an answer to my lament, but I lay with tears falling gently on my bed and still utter, why?

It seems so silent here in my grief, but I know you’re there God and I love you still. 

I know you hear me and understand the frustration that is enveloped in the question,

Why?

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I can’t Push  Past The Why.  🥺
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